This is week 12 for me and I fell in love with this exercise. Though I do not have children, this piece was about me seeing my child in the future. Hope all of you will enjoy reading this as I did writing it.
I thought I saw you smile as if it were for the first time. Your innocent cerulean eyes squinted beneath your nose as you beamed with delight. Tiny hands began to coil around mine – taking a hold of me as if you were troubled about the future. You were afraid of the dark – the gloomy night that surrounded you.
You thought you saw a monster; a gangly creature that hid beneath your bed. Nothing but dust bunnies and wild treasures of imagination lay underneath the surface of the floor. I scooped you up and placed you in my arms. I could feel the balminess of you heating every fiber of my heart. The scent of baby powder escaped from your skin and I breathed in every moment of innocence I had with you.
The night was still lengthy and quiet. Your sluggish eyes started to close and drift into a realm of imagination. I placed you back into your bed and watched as you gently snoozed. This was a moment that kept me awake, for I would be afraid of missing seconds with you.
You woke the next morning to convey your creative dreams – a bunny with elongated ears hopping to tell you about a dinosaur that came to town. I would giggle as you would embrace me with your character of life. Your skin glowed as the sun braced your face. I felt a sense of sorrow wash over me. I knew that someday I would have to let you go.
You would grow up to be a handsome young man. Perhaps an intellectual doctor or a painter that splashed romance on a canvas would be your profession of choice. You would dance into the arms of a lover and marry for the first time.
I thought I saw a boy who cached rays of sunshine in a bucket. A petite child with such a vast heart would embrace my world – a child that I would call my son.
16 comments:
That was beautiful! The descriptions were original and the story was full of emotion! I loved the "painter who splashed romance" Basically, I thought the whole piece payed great attention to detail and was thoughtfully written. Great writing!
a 'painter who splashed romance' and 'rays of sunshine in a bucket' lovely descriptions :)
This is extremely emotional. Despite being unable to relate to it, I find some parts truly fantastic, particularly the descriptive style. I did enjoy reading it. I think you managed to capture the lightheartedness and innocence of a child who finds wonder in a simple dream.
/ Rain
You managed to capture the delicate balance of emotions a mother with her small child. Very well done.
Warm, heartfelt, and sweet. The way you unfold his childhood throughout was awesome. I'm with Sarah, 'painter who splashed romance' and 'rays of sunshine in a bucket' are both musically beautiful desciptions.
So sweet. I can totally relate to this and the feeling of not wanting to eventually be forced to let go.
Lovely.
Magnificently sweet and touching. For some reason, I pictured the child as a girl until you specified that he was a boy. Nonetheless, beautiful piece you have written!
Stephanie, You're going to be a great mom! The love you have for an unborn child is very powerful. I love your description of the child growing up into a profession and marriage. Well done!
So very beautiful...your heart is already full with the love you will have some day.
That brought a tear to my eye, the words/phrases you used just portrayed the emotions beautifully.
Lovely writing Stephanie... some great imagery, too. Just a word of caution (if I may be a bit picky) - watch your facial placement... squinting eyes are not beneath noses, unless you have an alien child! If the child was hanging upside down to see under the bed, it might be better to mention that... just a thought :)
What a beautiful thought of what could come. Wonderful descriptions.
It really struck me how spot on you were in describing the all-consuming love a parent might feel for their child, without yet being a parent. You nailed it!
Strange, like Kerry I also pictured a girl until you said otherwise.
Great piece of writing. I loved your closing line, a wonderful stream of consciousness!
Oh, meant to add that I loved the "a painter who splashed romance"!
Thank you everyone for your beautiful comments and suggestions! I cherish each one of them. :)
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